Menstrual Cycle: Day 4
Navigating the Pendulum: Finding Balance Between Structure and Freedom
[thought]: Newton’s First Law: Inertia. Why? Because I spent whole day, not really all that time, becoming passive. Like waiting for something to tell me to move. Hmmm
[feeling]: disappointed, regret
[body]: throbbing headache medium
[thought]: yes, we’re like that all the time
[thought]: ssshhh.. gosh, not all the time. there are just times we need time-off of realities.
[thought]: and after that.. there’s that reality of feelings again of not happy or satisfied that you’ve chosen to be passive. crazy thoughts, isn’t it?
[thought]: well i guess we all need to live with that paradox. you can’t just have it all. we can’t just have. we don’t predict what will we feel next if we choose this.
[thought]: this is a big topic, big thoughts, to tinker. big crack to dig
[thought]: a big No head shaking at the back of my mind
[feeling]: displeased
[body]: light throbbing headache
[thought]: i know this is some kind of a big topic to talk about because we’ll be talking about the extremes at both ends. how would we know if we do this and that? we need two points of reference to begin with
[thought]: you know what, you crave for certainty. and it can’t happen the way you want it to. because if you focus on following the plan to the T.. you get exahusted and now you feel bad or what again. that traume feelings that KNB befell on you will haunt you again. look, i’m just trying to help you here. because you’ve done the craziest shit ive ever seen in you. and a big NO NO. now we know that it’s a big NO. HELL NO, ok?
[thought]: so, what we’re doing now is trying to find the middle-ground. and for the past 3 months (1st quarter of 2025), you’ve been or trying to navigate at the end of the spectrum.. almost the DOING NOTHING. KNB was out. NETWORKING was out. SOCIAL MEDIA crazy shits was out. What’s left? Your mind was went crazy because it’s DETOXIFYING your toxic 2 year activities like you’re going to die in a minute. It ain’t easy. And because of that that this wooshbrain.com was born. You hardly know yourself without those “responsibilities” you want to own even though it’s none of your business.
[thought]: remembering Tara McMullin’s phase in her book, WHAT WORKS.
[body]: light throbbing headache, sigh
[thought]: yes, i agree. it just feels different without a little bit strict of a structure
[thought]: come on, Maan Gail. hahahahahahaha! you’re lying. you don’t like strict structure even for a bit. you just made me smile
[body]: smiling
[thought]: you know what, to end this.. just please relax. you are just doing fine. you can even have this chance of conversing with your thoughts?! isn’t that great? that means.. you have this time to just be.
[thought]: husband, Jason, is now calling for a video call
[thought]: ookay, ciao for now. thanks!
[thought]: just let it be for now. wisdom will follow, Gail. ayaw kabalakaw. focus lang unsay dapat himoon nimo karong adlawa. limti na ang kagahapon. let’s move forward.
[thought]: okay. salamat kaayo sa suporta.
end at 8:30
WooshBrain 