Same Sun, Same Body, Different Balance
[nostalgic visual trigger]: familiar 16:00 sunny afternoon to my home town, Manticao.
Kingston, ON view
[conscious]: Philippines AND Canada. Same emotions, same wonderings, same sun and heat, same air.. it’s still earth. Same worries, same wishes of financial stability, safety and security. Same uncertainty. Same fears. What differs?
[insightful thought]: the difference is: back home gives emotional stability and comfort against uncertainty. It’s a balancer or a stabilizer.
[conscious]: same body I’m carrying. Nothing changes. What changed is my outlook.
[critical thought]: what’s with all these?
[wise advisor thought]: The problem is you listen too much on one voice in your head. It gives less trust and confidence within you.
[confrontational thought]: You overeat this afternoon even you’re not hungry. You’re not comfortable with uncomfortable.
[disappointed thought]: I told you to talk to us when it arises but you chose to distract your mind with endless YT scrolling or watching Shogun series.
[balanced perspective thought]: I mean it’s not bad, but you are compromising your health because you don’t know what else to do.
[conscious thought]: I still feel uncomfortable if there’s not much to do almost in the entire afternoon.
[realistic thought]: that is going your life back home. You better practice calming your mind if there’s nothing much to do. It is what it is.
[supportive thought]: Don’t be scared. Breathe. Let it go. It ain’t easy.
[pleading thought]: Let’s talk it out. One by one. A day without you talking it out feels ‘gout’ murag piniriso mi. Don’t try to silenced us, it’s hurting you.
[inviting thought]: Come back again.
[warning thought]: You’re listening too much in one voice. And I don’t like it at all. Not good
[nurturing thought]: Get some good night sleep. You’ll need it. We’ll talk more
[body]: throughout this internal conversation, my stress response elevated.
[emotions]: feeling meh and uneasy
WooshBrain 